"Are you married?" No, do you see a ring? Or anything that would suggest someone gives two shits about me. No you don't. However this leads to the inevitable question:
"Have you ever been married?" First off are you fucking serious? I still get asked if I'm still in high school! Sure, I'm kind of a fuck up, but I don't have a "starter marriage" under my belt already. However the stupid round of questioning doesn't end up there. Oh no, people have to establish just how miserably lonely I am so:
"Do you have a boyfriend?" No...I'm kinda pathetic like that.
"Oh, so do you have kids then?" Of course this is a logical explanation for my 'single' status!? I mean clearly being 24, not completely haggard looking and not having a significant other must mean I have an amazing amount of baggage, right? No, you asshole I don't have a kid. Birth control isn't that complicated ya know and since I have an IQ higher then that of, say a rock, I have managed to avoid any annoying, squalling two legged shit machines. Thanks.
The response to all of this:
"Smart girl, you'll have more fun if you just do your own thing."
Fuck you! I would love to have someone to keep my feet warm at night, to laugh with (or at), or just to zone out with. Instead I think I'm just going to go eat a pint of Ben&Jerry's.
